How To Be You

How To Be You

Funny topic, huh?

I can't believe I've gotta talk to you about this.

Seems so elementary, FUNDAMENTAL. 

Your 'thought of the day' is meaningless when you don't back it with your experience.

Maybe I read like a bitch writing this. Probably I am but I care too much not to teach you about this...

Your value is your experience in life -- every minute you've drawn breath on this Earth -- and how you couch that experience in a way that others learn from it.

No matter who you are, how you make money or even how much money you make, you have SO MUCH TO GIVE.

Why don't you believe it?

What do you tell yourself about that?

Is it a story like, "I don't even want the life I'm living, why would I share it? Who would want this?"?????????

I need you to look back at your life 3 years ago. Your life may have radically changed in the past year even, but let's look at 3 years ago...

What has changed since? What was new and exciting to you at that time?

THAT version of you is who you need to talk to.

Tell her how you got HERE where you are now.

Tell her...
The twists + turns.
The wins + losses.
The LESSONS.

Imagine you could make easier the path from 3 years ago to where you are now, and collapse the timeline by talking to her.

ADVISING her.

What shouldn't she do?
What should she do?
Where can she improve her thoughts + actions to get great results faster?

Share that!
Share the gold you've mined from your life experience with everyone.

Because...
You may not be able to tell all of this to a younger version of you, but you CAN share it all with Julia, Lauren, Erin or whoever else out there is where you were three years ago.

All of those SHEs could use your help, your guidance, your care.

Am I getting through to you yet?
Do you GET it?

THAT is your power.

THAT is why you're here in this world: to live your life, learn the lessons, and share it all with the world to help others live their best life.

Let me lead by example...

Last night, I was waiting for a food delivery. (We order out often; I really only want to cook when I'm inspired -- not every time I'm hungry -- and that works for me.) So anyway, as I drafted a text message to the guard in the lobby to let them know a delivery would be coming, I had to choose a word to refer to the floor I live on.

See... three years ago my boyfriend and I moved out of the apartment with his mom and her boyfriend on the lease, where we were sleeping on couches, into our second apartment together. We still live here. It's a little small... a studio apartment... but it's on the top floor of a high-rise in Northeast Philadelphia, overlooking one of the city's beautiful parks, with a balcony, and what was (3 years ago) a totally brand new kitchen and bathroom with motherfuckin' subway tile. DAAAAAAMN, Gina. We were so excited, and relieved, and did I mention EXCITED?! A space of our own again, that we could do with as we please, and where we were meant to be. And another cool thing: while the 8 floors between the ground floor and mine had numbers on the buttons in the elevator, the button for my floor said "PH" for penthouse, AND you have to swipe a key fob to even PRESS the button for the penthouse! Like, kind neighbors who live below us who get on the elevator first ask where we're going so they can press the button for us, and we have to say, "I've gotta get it, thank you!"

Like... We're fucking special.

But OH.MY.GOD. do I freak about that!!! As in... I don't want to be obnoxious.

Chris has, for the past three years, called us "penthouse people," with ownership, pride. And I couldn't. I couldn't even call the floor we live on anything other than the 10th floor. I would never dare say penthouse.

So as I drafted the text last night to the guard... I realized why I wasn't just typing the word "penthouse." It dawned on me that I had a block about referring to my home using this one specific term for fear of sounding like a pompous jerk.

As soon as I realized WHY I wanted to censor myself on this (and have done for years), I also realized I had to push myself to do it, even if I was squirming. Because my next level? It may be a bigger apartment... but it's definitely going to be on the penthouse floor. Because after all...

I'm a fucking penthouse cunt. (Who's also generally really approachable and cringing slightly at my own use of the four-letter C-word.)

And as I write this, I realize that perhaps the "key" to upleveling into a bigger apartment, which has felt out of reach for me, was deciding that I AM a penthouse person. 

Owning who you are, after all, is one of the keys to getting what you want. At least that's what I believe....

I journaled last night after I hit SEND on the text to the guard calling my 10th floor the penthouse. I KNEW then that I have to start showing off my home. It's something that Rosella from 3 years ago was SO FUCKING excited about she would have been talking on Facebook Live about it for an hour or more. She was so excited to have this beautiful new place to call home. And the only reason I haven't felt that way in a while is because it's so NORMAL to me now (the size of the apartment at least, and the unique features of it, if not the penthouse status).

Because I'm a woman who takes action on the intuitive guidance I receive, I shared a photo of my gorgeous park view and a snap of the lit-up button for the Penthouse floor on Snapchat and Instagram Live today. And I'll share these things more regularly because my current NORMAL was new and exciting to Rosella from 3 years ago (and probably to at least one of you reading!).

In fact, writing the paragraph above about the high-rise, subway tile, park view apartment that I was feeling so dull about got my blood racing. I'm turned on when I tell you about this amazing thing I manifested for myself and my boyfriend.

Shit, I forgot to mention the WALK IN CLOSET.

All my life I DREAMED of a walk in closet. NOW? It's my fucking *normal* reality.

Like fuck me! I FORGOT how AMAZING my life here is. THAT makes me a bigger bitch than encouraging you to share more of yourself (no matter what language I use to tell you this) or even calling myself a penthouse person.

Ouch.

I've been SUCH a bitch for a while now.

THIS, THIS, THIS, THIS. THIS! is why I want YOU TO SHARE MORE OF YOU. I want you to be YOU in this way because it's not only what everyone else wants and needs from you, but it's also what YOU need.

So... Do you get it NOW? 

Have I made myself abundantly clear?

I think so... I'm off now to post a pic of subway tile to my social media. ;)

Increase Your Miracle Awareness

Increase Your Miracle Awareness

One day sitting in the leasing office where I've worked part-time (it's a bridge job) with C, my coworker, she laughed and tells me about this email she got expressing interest in interviewing her for some industry publication. She saw it and said something like, "Oh, boy. I don't even know why they'd want to talk to me..." She was dismissing an opportunity before investigating it.

"What if this is God turning the light on your next step?" I asked her.

She laughed. "You know, you're right! I'll take a look at this later," she said.

Six months ago, I would have NEVER used 'God' but I have been cultivating my miracle awareness for a long time.

Miracle awareness refers to your ability to perceive acts of love.

I have a question for you:

How often do you see love as the motive for someone else's actions toward you?

True, sometimes another person is motivated by fear instead of love when they "come atchu." Do you then respond through fear?

That's the thing... Sometimes people will outright ATTACK you. Other times, they're clearly acting from LOVE. And then there are the actions of others that could fall in either category depending on your perceptual frame.

If your perceptual frame is love, you'll be more likely to read an email offering you an interview for an industry magazine as an exciting thing, a gift. If your perceptual frame is fear, you'll be mighty skeptical of such a surprise.

I'm no damn saint. There are plenty of times I respond through fear to another person's attack. One such time I responded with fear happened shortly after C and I laughed about her response to an opportunity.

A few days after C got the magazine editor's email, I got a phone call from someone at the local classic rock radio station telling me about how I can win big by listening to the station later that afternoon. I was riled up by phone calls I'd gotten earlier and a personal email about our car insurance payment that was about 10x what it should be... So I was seeing through FEAR. I got the call and told the guy, "Nah, I'm good." I hung up and spun to tell C about it.

"What if that was God paying you back?" she asked.

I felt my face contort, responding on its own to her query. What if she was right?!?!

"C'mon," she said. "I usually rely on you to see things that way!"

I clapped my hands together, looked to the ceiling and only half-jokingly told God to send me whatever I was supposed to receive that day: miracles, money, wisdom, whatever.

We laughed.

See? Sometimes I, too, need to be reminded to return to miracle awareness.

A Course In Miracles indicates that a miracle is an expression of love. So miracle awareness is about seeing the miracle in the seemingly mundane.

How To Cultivate Miracle Awareness

Begin by observing your thought patterns as you engage with the world. What makes you feel happy and what makes you feel anxious?

Examine your reactions and the original incidences periodically. Why did you have the specific reaction you did? What if you'd chosen to see things differently?

Do this over time, and eventually your immediate reactions to MOST things will be based on your perception of love.

Truly, it's a habit, and like any habit, you must make regular, repeated efforts toward your desired end. Choose miracle awareness as your dominant way of looking at the world.

It's looking at the world through rose-colored glasses.

xo,

Rosella

P.S. Do you want everything you touch to turn to (rose) gold? If miracle awareness feels hard-to-grasp, and you're ready to transform your mindset so you can achieve success as a woman and entrepreneur, I've got something for you.

This is individual support through weekly coaching sessions and daily support through FB Messenger/text. Constant, 'high-touch' coaching for the woman entrepreneur who is ready to develop a strong wealth consciousness, feel her most creative and confidently build her empire.

This is Rose Gold 90-Day Coaching.

Over 12 sessions, we'll explore desire, open you up to receiving miracles, and get your head right so you can build the structure of your business.

Book a call to discuss Rose Gold coaching here.

Make The Most Of Yourself: Coach Yourself In Writing

Make The Most Of Yourself: Coach Yourself In Writing

There's nothing you can't accomplish putting words on paper (or screen). Coaching yourself is a powerful practice wherein you examine your thoughts, ask yourself important questions, and make transformation happen.

Here's what I take for granted about you if you're reading this:
(1) You want to transform your life; your growth turns you on.
(2) You have some familiarity with coaching, whether you currently work with a coach 1-on-1, have in the past or never actually hired a coach.
(3) You can use Word (or some other app) or pen and paper.

I'd like to make some other guesses about you based on who I'm calling in to join my tribe, but let's just stick with these three assumptions.

So, you want to experience growth in any area of your life and you want to speed that growth. An amazing way to do this is to coach yourself.

It's quite simple, really.

I do this process in my physical journal with my favorite pen, or by typing it out. (Right now one of my favorite tools is found at writer.bighugelabs.com; it's an interface where you can determine the background and text color and even turn on typewriter sounds.) 

Sometimes I have a specific goal in mind for my "coaching session." Other times, it starts with me trying to figure out what I'm meant to write about today (since I don't want to pay the 'pay the piper' the consequences of not creating). 

From there, I ask myself lots of questions. Usually my goal is to figure out either why I'm NOT taking action or why I'm taking the action I am... From there, I figure out HOW to take action to get into flow & alignment.

Basically, that's it! To illustrate, here is a 'coaching session' I had with my keyboard earlier...

---

April 18, 2017
10:30 p.m. EDT

What do I have to say? What? What WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT?????

UGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH

I AM HERE TO CREATE, HERE TO WRITE,

i NEED TO BE CREATING. WRITING.

I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY.
THERE IT IS... BENEATH THE SURFACE
WHAT'S THERE?

WHY IS IT SO EASY FOR SOME PEOPLE?
WHY HAVEN'T I JUST FUCKING ALLOWED IN EVERYTHING I DESIRE?

THAT'S THE THING, ISN'T IT? 

THE... I JUST CAN'T SEEM TO LET THIS BE EASY... FUCKING THING.

WHO'S GOING TO STOP ME? WHAT'S GOING TO STOP ME? NOTHING. THAT'S THE KEY ATTITUDE.

RIGHT?

SO HOW TO I MAKE THAT HABIT?

HOW DO I INTEGRATE THAT IDEA? ASSIMILATE IT? 

AFFIRMATIONS? AFFORMATIONS?

Refer to Napoleon Hill's writing on suggestion?

So.... What if I just let it all be easy? What if I let go of all my blocks? What if I was in ALIGNMENT? 

Alignment.... I journaled about alignment and it seems as though life would be much different if I were in alignment. I'd be having way more sales conversations.... like, selling all day everyday. I actually WANT to sell all day every single day. Yes, that's what is feeling most delicious to me right now.

So what does that look like?

Adding the P.S. to each post I publish?
Putting out content specifically about my offers
Posting link to get people to sign up for a discovery call
Inviting people to private message me
Private messaging others

First, I need clarity on what my clients will get from my program, right?
Or haven't I already done the work of clarifying all that?
Do I need to read it over and over until it sticks?
Yes, probably.

That's what I need to do... Integrate it so I OWN it, that transformational power my work will create. I can also journal about it more creatively.

Here's what I commit to doing daily:
* Speed Dial the Universe journal pages
* Journal to call in soulmate clients
* Write a blog post
* Publish blog post to blog & Facebook Group
* Post to Facebook profile
* Post to Facebook Page
* Post to Twitter
* Post to Snapchat, Instagram Stories, and Facebook Stories
* Go Live on Facebook Page
* Post about my current offering
* Message people privately
* Post to Pinterest

Wow, that feels like a long list. Can I do most of that in less than 2 hours? Yes. So why get overwhelmed? Make it part of my day. I should be sharing my life all day.

Work week vlog created with Snapchats/Instagram Live videos? Would that be cool? I kinda like the idea....

How do fan accounts operate on social? They repost content from the stars they're honoring. What would it feel like to have fans so passionate about me they create fan accounts? Wow. I kinda can't imagine that. Does Gwen Stefani ever look at those accounts? Others? 

Are those things I listed the things that the next-level version of Rosella would be doing with her days? YES. That's the quick answer! Like, gut answer.

---

COMMENT BELOW: What did you take away from reading this coaching session with myself? Let me know what comes up for you.

WANT TO PUBLISH THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EMAILS OR ON YOUR BLOG?  

You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Rosella LaFevre is the Business Coach helping women entrepreneurs master mindset and intuitive marketing so they can enjoy a life lived on purpose. Get the FREE report on the #1 Secret to Signing 1:1 Clients: http://www.rosellalafevre.com/clients-free

Exercise Your Creative Power On The Page To See It IRL

Exercise Your Creative Power On The Page To See It IRL

Y'all haven't met me yet if it's news to you I love journaling. (They really need to update the dictionary with the word "journaling." It's a thang, Merriam-Webster.) Anywho...

Get to know me even better inside my community >>

I kept a diary on and off as a kid, but I wasn't consistent for more than a month or two at a time. (One of my favorite books -- before it became a movie -- was Princess Diaries, and just like Amelia Mignonette Thermopolis Renaldi, I'd keep dated & time-stamped entries that indicated which class I was in at the time.) Most of those entries were gossip about others, boring play-by-plays of shit happening in school, bitching about my sister or mother or father, and mooning over the latest crush.

Those old diaries didn't see me exercising my creative powers very often.

Here's what I mean by creative powers: As we all have a connection to the Universe and our thoughts create our reality per the Law of Attraction, we have the option of using our brain power to focus on what CAN be, instead of simply what IS. Your journal can be a powerful tool for helping you unleash your creative powers to bring into your life all the Rosier Results you can imagine.

Tweet: We have the option of using our brain power to focus on what CAN be, instead of simply what IS http://bit.ly/2olbFd1

We have the option of using our brain power to focus on what CAN be, instead of simply what IS.

I've been writing in my journal basically every day for the last four years, and my "style" has shifted a few times over the years. At first, I was mostly filling my journal with quotes from people I admired and my own creative ideas for businesses, products, and blog posts. Then I did more gratitude lists than anything, and took notes on Livestreams and other content I was consuming. I tried other prompts and things.

Right now, I start my day with the prompts that make up Jeanna Gabellini's Speed Dial The Universe journal. The way her prompts are organized open me up to imagining the creative ways that my dreams might come true.

Seriously, more than ever before, I'm EXCITED to wake up in the morning because I know I'll be doing these pages again.

Three elements of the journaling I do each morning seem to encourage me to get especially creative.

1. Assign tasks to the Universe.

There's an exercise in the book, Ask and It Is Given by Jerry and Esther Hicks, and that exercise requires you to decide what you'll be responsible for the day. There, on the other side of the page or spread in your journal, you list all the other things that must get done that day, which you're handing over to the Universe. This is essentially that. I choose my main 3-6 tasks for the day (these are the essential things I want to get done before anything else), and then I list other things for the Universe to handle. I've listed things such as arrangements for a trip to Paris, getting my website back up, and handling my food and drink for the day. And I swear this works. Here is my evidence: A couple of days after delegating Paris to the Universe, I got an email from the visitors bureau there. A day or two after delegating getting my website back up, the payment to Squarespace cleared, getting my site live. Within minutes of delegating food and drink, I was handed a stack of coupons for free coffee at Dunkin' Donuts. You CAN delegate to the Universe and see things manifest quickly.

2. Set an intention for one AWESOME thing to happen THAT day.

Ask yourself, "Wouldn't it be awesome today if ________ happened?" What WOULD be awesome? Be ludicrous. Issue your DEMAND, diva. Today, maybe it's someone gifts you a jar full of ONLY red Starburst. Tomorrow, you win a Lincoln MKZ in a luxury car giveaway. Big or small, it doesn't matter. Just experiment with what you can order up from an infinite menu of options each day. One day, I wrote... "Wouldn't it be awesome today if... the doorman called to tell me there's a package for me, and it contains a MacBook Air in rose gold!" The next day, I had a conversation with someone and dared to ask for the object of my desire. He agreed to get it for me.

3. Think creatively about how the puzzle pieces can come together to give you something you want.

Normally, Law of Attraction experts tell you to "fuck the how." Figuring out the means of a desired manifestation can block you from receiving the thing you want. But that's because we usually try to FORCE the things we want through a pinhole when the ways in which something can come to us are truly infinite. So, ponder the possibilities. What's something you want for yourself? Let's take my desire to write a book and have it traditionally published. (I've self-published a YA novel and I'm not above self-publishing additional books, but I'd also really love to work with professionals at a publisher like Hay House.) So let's go with that.... And what's an opportunity within reach? Speaking at an event.

So what if I spoke at a local event with a fashion bent? A local magazine editor comes to the event and tells her friend, who works at a major women's magazine in the website department about my presentation? That editor does her research and sees my blog. She reaches out to ask if I'd want to write a column for Cosmopolitan.com. I write a column and my posts become some of their most popular content. I even start writing a column for the monthly print magazine, and THEN an agent comes calling. She and her friend, an editor at Hay House, are both in love with my work and they want to turn my writing into a book. Are you down, they ask. Ummmmm, YESSSSSSSS!! Can you imagine? I certainly can!

Go ahead, journal about HOW... the crazy loops & twists your fate can take to bring you to the destination you desire.

You just might start to realize that you love the journey as much as you know you'll love the destination.

I feel exponentially more creative since I've made these a regular part of my journaling ritual. This is an especially fun way to start the day, but could be a great way to shift your energy before bed too. The point is...

You have amazing creative powers. Are you flexing them? [click to tweet]

Here's why I think these exercises really work:

A) The thought processes open you up to new possibilities. It's a chicken-and-egg sitch, honestly, because you have be open to start journaling this way. But once you get started, such creative thoughts will flow easily to you. They'll pour out of you, really.

B) You feel the FUN. When you're having fun with something, more of that energy (good stuff) wants to come your way. (Someone who has fun with money, even if they don't meet another's moral standards, will make more money than the person who feels they have to tightly manage their money and feels the resulting anxiety of trying to manage a thing that wants to move around.)

C) You've released your attachment to the HOW. Yes, even if you do exercise #3, you'll be releasing yourself from the WAY a desire manifests. Law of Attraction experts often preach nonattachment but fail to describe a process for releasing yourself from emotional attachment to its manifestation. These journaling exercises help me do that.

Go ahead and exercise your creative powers on paper today.

COMMENT BELOW: Share in the comments something you're delegating to the Universe today or something it would be awesome to receive today.

WANT TO PUBLISH THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EMAILS OR ON YOUR BLOG?  

You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Rosella LaFevre is the Business Coach helping women entrepreneurs master mindset and intuitive marketing so they can enjoy a life lived on purpose. Get the FREE report on the #1 Secret to Signing 1:1 Clients: http://www.rosellalafevre.com/clients-free

You Can Make A Home For Yourself

You Can Make A Home For Yourself

This morning I was journaling about you, the members of my tribe and clients who invest in my programs and products, and I realized that you, like me, never felt you quite fit in.

I remember how excited I was as a kid for every holiday. As Thanksgiving or Easter approached, I was practically bouncing in my seat, ready to see my cousins and aunts and uncles and my Grammy. I’d build it up in my head. So excited to see them. As an adult, I can’t remember what exactly I thought would happen, but it was like knowing you were going to win the lottery. And then… at some point during the day, I would inevitably experience the crash you feel when the lotto numbers are called and you fuckin’ lost.

Growing up, that sense of emptiness like I’d lost something big was actually pretty persistent.

It didn't matter WHERE I was... that emptiness followed.

How can I describe the craving I felt for kinship, for community, for BELONGING?

I generally had the sense that I was like nobody else around. No one GOT me. And though I tried, I didn't really GET them either. 

As a teenager, my only hope was that I'd someday find a guy who did get me. I prayed that my soulmate would come along, and fast. Bring him swiftly to me!? Could that be arranged? Yeah, I prayed.

I spent time in visualization, though I wasn't aware that this was a creative method that would actually bring him to me... I pictured, as my mother drove us somewhere and we sang along to cheesy '80s music, that I'd someday be driving alongside my soulmate, the two of us singing the same songs I was now singing. I imagined taking my future beau to family gatherings. Imagined him having discussions with my male cousins about sports. I imagined the wholeness I would feel when standing by his side.

And I dare argue I found my soulmate early in life. I was a month from 19 when I saw a guy had checked out my OKCupid profile, and I messaged him. That night we went on our first date. It's been almost 7 years since that night.

I found a man who I have lovingly described as the safe place from which I've been able to blossom. I've grown more outgoing, more assertive, more confident and in so many other ways than I can describe. But I only grew so much because I knew he saw me. Saw me the way I saw me. Saw me the way NO ONE ELSE EVER HAD. 

But even my path to him taught me that there are near-fits and perfect fits, and you should definitely hold out for the perfect fit.

Before Chris came a few other guys but one in particular comes to mind. He is a great guy, and I really hope he found his perfect fit, but we weren't it. And yet... Spending the weekend at his house, hanging out with his mom was the first time in a while I'd felt at home. His mom was a real person. She wore her flaws on her sleeve but she was loving and kind. She didn't ask for me to be any different than who I was, although I did in a sense pretend to be a different version of Rosella with that boyfriend... 

That relationship taught me that I could feel that homey feeling again but I could also hold out for someone who didn't want me to change...

Here's a really specific example: That boyfriend told me I'd have to learn how to drive if we were going to stay together. The truth is, I had one lesson behind the wheel of a Buick Rainier at 16 years old and that was enough for me. To this day, I have no desire to learn. Chris has never forced the issue. 

You deserve to be YOU. Any change you're going to make should be a change you want to make. Those around you -- and I mean everyone -- should be happy to support you in building your life the way you want and let go of their notions of what your life is supposed to look like.

If they don't? Call them in.

That's what I was doing this morning when I realized that you, my soulmate tribe and clients, have felt ill at ease before, like the emptiness of losing something because you haven't yet created a home for yourself. I was calling YOU in.

You can also take action to remove the clutter and toxicity from your life that prevent your soulmates from coming to you.

Here's the most potent example I can give you of this...

Most of that very same family I used to be ecstatic about seeing each Easter (and on every other major holiday) are people I no longer talk to. My parents' ugly divorce really forced the issue... And I decided to say "ta-ta for now" to my maternal family.

There was anger on their side that I refused to exile my father. And I was pissed as hell that they were trying to make me pick sides. Right before my college graduation I allowed my mother to effectively disown me...

This left a void. I had no idea how I would spend my holidays now. I decided I would never go back until I am apologized to, and that still hasn't happened almost four years later.

I missed the big family gatherings, though. I missed being surrounded by lots of people, and I craved, even if I didn't realize it at the time, finding a family that would love me unconditionally.

So the last I saw my mother and her family was Easter Sunday in 2013.

By Thanksgiving 2013, I was invited with my father to spend holidays with a family we'd known for years. These beautiful people are who I'll be spending Easter with this year.

Clearing space for the people who will LOVE you as you are while empowering you to grow may be painful at the start but it is, I promise, rewarding as fuck.

So, before or after your family gathering, take some time today to envision (with or without putting pen to paper: your choice) the soulmates you're making space for, whether they're just fans of your work, paying clients, a lover, or a "new" family that gets you.

I'm focused today, as everyday, on being grateful for those who love me and get me whether they've already arrived in my life or are on their way.

WANT TO PUBLISH THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EMAILS OR ON YOUR BLOG?  

You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Rosella LaFevre is the Business Coach helping women entrepreneurs master mindset and intuitive marketing so they can enjoy a life lived on purpose. Get the FREE report on the #1 Secret to Signing 1:1 Clients: http://www.rosellalafevre.com/clients-free

Daily Remind Yourself Of Who You Are

Daily Remind Yourself Of Who You Are

I keep forgetting who I am.

It’s like I’m Drew Barrymore in 50 First Dates. Head trauma got me all messed up and I need a video diary to watch each morning and remind me who I am and what’s important.

OK, maybe it’s not that bad. But in trying on different niches in business and trying to find MY thing, the thing for which I want to be known and am super fuckin’ excited to be talking about all day every day, I have mightily confused myself.

This is one of those things I probably should keep to myself so you’re not confused, but let’s be real, it doesn’t take me admitting I’m confused to confuse you. And yes, I just used the word ‘confuse’ too many damn times in one sentence… Sorry, Mrs. Gabow (my 7th grade RELA teacher -- as in, Reading English Language Arts because they had dumb names for English class).

You, if you’ve been following me for any length of time, have picked up on that confusion. It’s made you avoid taking action to work with me because what the hell was I going to help you with?

Well…

I’m clear now. I mean I have achieved a moment of pure clarity and I’m creating reminders for myself so I can hone my focus.

But before I really get to that, let’s talk about YOU.

Have you suffered from shiny object syndrome?

Let me guess…

You follow some amazing coaches or other entrepreneurs. You are so lit up by their own lit up-ness about their area of expertise you start to see it as the solution to all problems and you, wanting to both make money like they are and to help others, you start to zip yourself into their business skin.

This is not the first time or incarnation I’ve seen of imitation.

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, right?  

Or maybe you have very disparate gifts and you have simply never known how to put ‘em all together.

So the result is you, as someone wanting to make money in your own way (not having a J-O-B), feel really fuckin’ lost and in searching for answers bounce from thing to thing to thing.

I have in my lifetime aspired to be or worked as a teacher, fashion designer, magazine editor, hardcore investigative journalist, administrative assistant, public relations professional, ghostwriter, novelist, and marketing consultant.

That’s a lot of bouncing around. And I felt it mentally.

But the truth underneath all of those things are my skills and interests: creativity, writing, showing others the way things work, helping others share their own knowledge, and making money. And backing all those things, organizational skills.

I’ve been working with the same puzzle pieces all my life and trying to put them together to make a picture that keeps my attention.

You are, I’m sure, trying to do the same.

So what can I share about how to put it all together?

OWN ALL OF IT

Go ahead and own all of your skills, interests, professional abilities.

After deciding to give up journalism as my vocational pursuit, I thought I was done with writing. I stopped writing so much (other than the social media posts where I simply regurgitated the crap I read from others). I was focused mainly on finding the answer to the question: What will make me more money than I can spend?

And look -- I’ll NEVER say that wanting money (especially more than you can spend) is a bad thing. You need money to give life its fullest expression.

But I led myself to believe that the greatest gift I was given (and have had access to since, like, 6th grade) -- my ability to WRITE -- was something I should just give up.

Ew. That disgusts me… all the time I’ve wasted NOT writing.

The other thing I’ve long proven myself good at: taking action.

Before talking myself out of it, I started a digital magazine while in college. I took on multiple internships and freelance jobs while running that digital magazine and taking five classes each semester. I know how to take massive action, and I know how to take inspired action.

I am great at helping others bust through their blocks to take action.

STOP PUTTING YOURSELF INTO THE BOXES YOU THINK YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO FIT INTO.

I thought if I was going to make money as a marketing consultant, I had to give up creative writing or sharing the real me, including the current circumstances of my life. And so I tried to fit into that box. But I kept wanting to break out.

I avoided putting myself into the coach box because I wondered who the fuck am I to be a coach to anybody. But I also didn’t realize this was a way I could step OUT of all the other boxes and let my freak flag fly while owning all my crazy different talents and interests.

I just honestly didn’t know earlier in my life that this was a valuable service I could parlay into a living. And I’m sort of (crazy as it seems now) realizing that one of the tools I can use to do so is writing.

So it’s coming all together, finally.

I’m calling myself a mindset coach because my struggles in life to believe I’m worthy and to allow myself to receive have shown me that simply BELIEVING, TRUSTING, FAITHING (I know I just fuckin’ made that up), in the Universe to provide and ME to receive it all is the key to a happy, fulfilled life. But I now know I am so much more than JUST a coach focused on one topic.

The more I let go and stop trying to force myself into some box, the more I open up to receive amazing opportunities I couldn’t have controlled into being.

BREAK OFF A PIECE OF IT TO SHARE WITH OTHERS IF YOU WANNA MONETIZE IT.

This is the hardest part for me, and my feelings about it continue to shift.

The other day I had to write an introduction to present to a Facebook Group I was guest hosting. I didn’t think that anything I’d ever previously written about who I am, what I do and how I help others was really going to be a match for where I’m currently at.

Then I found a shorter post I’d written about my ability to help others figure out what was stopping them from taking the action they desired to take. It needed a few tweaks, but there I was: or at least, there a piece of me was. A piece of my value to the world all summed up in a pretty tidy little package.

Because basically, that’s what I want to do, what I was BORN to do: Help others figure out for themselves HOW to get moving. It’s not about me pushing them up the hill or showing them a bald path. It’s about helping them build their muscles to move the boulders out of their way. (And using metaphors often to convey to them my own purpose and theirs! Teehee.)

I get really annoyed when people ask me to do things FOR them. I’ve never been particularly good at asking other people to do stuff for me so I’ve never been one to like being asked to do for others. (Though it’s different when I want to VOLUNTEER to do for someone… I’ve got problems with authority!) And so, I’d rather show someone else how to do for themselves what I can do for myself.

This includes getting out of my own way to take action.

So…. Who am I?

In a small, digestible chunk, here’s how I describe my power:

“I am a Mindset Coach, and I especially love working with women entrepreneurs to help them master the growth mindset necessary to achieve Rosier Results in terms of their impact, financial wealth and happiness with their lives.

“Early in my work with a client and then over and over, I help my clients figure out what exactly STOPS them DEAD in their tracks so the train can get moving again. (Resistance takes many forms: fear, limiting beliefs, perfectionism, and more. It often looks like procrastination or failing to think big. You stay stuck and struggle to achieve what you want.) Once you know what's been stopping you, action is so much easier! Sheer willpower isn't always enough to get your train moving again. I firmly believe that discovering what your resistance actually is empowers you to move past it.

“On one particular call, I got straight to the heart of the other woman's resistance to doing Facebook Live. She revealed to me that she worried about saying ‘the wrong thing.’ When I asked her, ‘What could you possibly say that would be wrong?’ She couldn't identify a single thing. Poof! Resistance zapped! A few days later she did her first Live, all because on that call she had a breakthrough. Because that's what the breakthroughs sometimes look like: realizing there's nothing logical about the resistance and then BOOM! the action is easy AF.”

And these three paragraphs remind me (in no particular order):

(1) I’m a damn good writer.

(2) I’m a great action-taker.

(3) I’m a teacher/coach.

(4) I help others get unstuck.

So, to DAILY REMIND MYSELF OF WHO I AM, I printed this out and taped it in the front of my journal (which naturally goes everywhere with me). I can read it each morning and again whenever I need a reminder of who I really am.

Because let’s be real: There’s no shame in needing to remind yourself of your power. In fact, I think the reason any of us fall prey to fear is because we’ve forgotten we’re the powerful children of the Universe.

As such, you’ve got gifts to own and share with the rest of us, your brothers and sisters.

If you need to write down a statement that captures the essence of your power to read over and over until you get it, you just go right on ahead.

COMMENT BELOW: Have you written something similar? Please share it below!

WANT TO PUBLISH THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EMAILS OR ON YOUR BLOG?  

You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Rosella LaFevre is the Business Coach helping women entrepreneurs master mindset and intuitive marketing so they can enjoy a life lived on purpose. Get the FREE report on the #1 Secret to Signing 1:1 Clients: http://www.rosellalafevre.com/clients-free

Let Me Teach You To Fill Up Your Cup

Let Me Teach You To Fill Up Your Cup

The fucking glass half full/half empty bit.

A total cliche by now, right?

Except someone just powerfully reframed this for thousands if not millions of people. Mo Gawdat, a Google exec, shared his ‘algorithm for happiness’ with a news anchor. You may have seen the Facebook video.

It fleetingly caught my attention the other day when I saw it in my news feed. And then I moved on.

But as I was journaling this morning about how to turn up the volume in my life and business, I came to some realizations...

Did you know I studied journalism at college? Yup!

Writing always came easily to me. Not that I was always great at it, but I was motivated to grow my skills and absorbed as much knowledge as I could by reading lots and having my mother, a professional editor, proofread my stuff. I started by turning a school assignment in 6th grade into a short story. (Actually, I guess it started earlier than that when I wrote a children’s book about a couple who met at a candy shop and fell in love and got married -- the ultimate fairy tale, right?!) After that, I was obsessive about writing. I churned out more short stories and novels between 6th grade and high school graduation than I can count.

Somewhere along the way, I read Linda Ellerbee’s Girl Reporter series and I fell in love with the idea of exposing toxic chemical dumping (or did I just want to be a fashion editor at a magazine? I waffled a bit). In junior year of high school, a student teacher with fond memories of her own years at my high school led her to seek students who wanted to resuscitate the school newspaper, which had been defunct for three years.

My friend Sam and I jumped for joy and we became co-editors of the newspaper, which we brought back for one edition that year. That seemed to seal my fate as a journalist. I got accepted to a summer camp for aspiring journalists run at that time by the staff of the Philadelphia Daily News, and then I went to Temple University with my major declared from day 1: journalism.

This gave me an education in truth…

At least the way it’s defined by journalists. See, journalists see FACTS (not the alternative kind *ahem*) as TRUTH. And I guess you could say they honor each source’s take on the facts as that individual’s truth… But as a journalist, you’re not allowed your own personal truth. Not really. Instead, objectivity reigns. Or, it would if humans were capable of such a thing.

I honestly don’t fucking think humans are capable of objectivity.

Subjectivity is truth, which means there are billions (or multiple billions) of truths.

Or are there a few Universal truths and everything else is just a variation on those core truths?

I’ve been journaling a lot lately about TRUTH. In fact, I woke up from a nap this week with the words, “Truth Apprenticeship,” in my head. The name for a coaching program? Perhaps…

I see all of these blog posts and every page in my journal as my truth. And I think that my truth, same as yours, is ever-evolving. I aspire to, in any given moment, share my absolute truth, knowing it could all change in a moment. In fact, many times, HOPING it will change in a moment.

Look, the most amazing thing in the world to me, is when someone else shares their truth.

You can usually tell. There’s a dynamicness to it, a real spark, and you know it’s their truth because you can’t look away. (When someone’s content bores me so much I can’t keep reading, I take that as a sign that it’s not their truth; they’re usually regurgitating the crap that other people are telling them.)

And my current understanding of truth feels so much different from what I learned as a journalist.

Like I said, I don’t think objectivity is actually achievable… I think I always secretly disagreed with it, though I felt I couldn’t admit it to the serious journalists who were my professors and editors. I didn’t just want to report facts or chronologically retell the happenings of a community meeting. I wanted to LIVE a life, not report on others!

Also, as a “recovering journalist,” I’ve come to realize the true occupational hazard of that work: skepticism & suspicion. I used to be skeptical and jaded about life. Things were horrible and they’d never get better, no matter how much ink was spilled about the horribleness. (This is still truth to me, but I simply see it as proof of the Law of Attraction: you get what you focus on.) That was super fuckin’ depressing.

Now? I’m unabashedly happy to see POTENTIAL everywhere around me.

I appreciate what exists and improve upon it if I can.

I no longer understand those who simply write about the glass being half-empty, as if pointing it out to others to say, “Hey, this needs to be fixed but I won’t dare try fixing it myself.”

Before I’d ever heard Mo Gawdat describe his algorithm for happiness, I’d started to see the world that way.

I appreciate what’s already in my cup.

And I ask myself if I can do something about the part that’s empty.

I always believe I can do something about the part that’s half-empty. I take that action myself, or ask for help from those who know better.

And look, I don’t want to fill up everybody else’s cup for them.

I want to show YOU how, if you don’t know, to fill up your cup, so that you can do it again and again and again.

One of the most powerful ways I can show you how to fill up your cup is to keep mine topped off.

So, that is, quite simply, what my gift for writing is meant to help me do: Show you my cup, my TRUTH, and dispense from my life whatever wisdom I’ve gathered that can help you fill up yours and live your own desired truth.

How am I doing so far?

WANT TO PUBLISH THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EMAILS OR ON YOUR BLOG?  

You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Rosella LaFevre is the Business Coach helping women entrepreneurs master mindset and intuitive marketing so they can enjoy a life lived on purpose. Get the FREE report on the #1 Secret to Signing 1:1 Clients: http://www.rosellalafevre.com/clients-free

How I Almost Killed Myself With A Belief Backed By Deep Emotion

How I Almost Killed Myself With A Belief Backed By Deep Emotion

A sour burp.

Persistent, dull ache inside my skull. 

A grumble from my stomach.

I needed to eat. 

Noodles, sloppy joe sauce, that salmon cut in the freezer that should’ve been thrown out months ago, packets of oatmeal that officially expired two years ago, cans of tuna... 

These were the assorted contents of my fridge and cabinets. None of them appealed. Some were straight-up disgusting to consider.

I probably wouldn’t have much if anything to eat until the deposit cleared in 48 hours.

Fucking weekend. Bank hours. Screwed.

And goddam I knew this was going to happen.

It’s never easy. Nothing is ever easy or goes right for me.

YOU CAN’T THINK GOOD THOUGHTS WHEN YOU ARE BURPING FUMES FROM AN EMPTY STOMACH. This I know is true.

This is a snapshot of one of the darkest moments I experienced this winter. I asked for all the learning about mindset I could handle and it has come at me hard and fast in the last six months or so.

I knew that mindset is critical to our success, and that this is something I’m passionate enough to talk about and help clients with, but I felt I needed deeper awareness of my own blocks and how to get past them. This isn’t new work for me, but it has been more intense than ever.

And I’m filled with gratitude for it now that my stomach isn’t doing the hunger burps. 

So a few months ago, I was waiting for a client to pay their monthly retainer. It wouldn’t clear in my bank account on a Saturday, so I had a very bleak weekend. I spent two days in bed, sleeping 16+ hours each day because I was just so hungry and couldn’t bring myself to eat the nutritional (and not-so-nutritional) odds and ends in my apartment.

Somehow we (my boyfriend and I) managed to get something semi-bearable to eat each day, but mostly I was just fucking STARVING.

And I was! I mean, this is true feast and famine shit I have experienced.

Why was I here?

I thought I knew but it wouldn’t come to me until a session later with my coach. My coach was the one to point out that I have said many times to her, “I would rather die than have a J-O-B.”

I had said it so many times, and believed it with such depth of emotion, that I had effectively risked my very LIFE. Jen, my coach, pointed out that the two things you need to just survive are food and shelter, and I found myself almost evicted in December and struggling to eat. She basically mentioned this observation and how it had come together for her.

I was FLOORED. She was right! So right!

It was a concept that had floated past me before, and after our call, I looked it up. I had read about it in Think And Grow Rich. This is the passage:

"The pages of medical history are rich with illustrations of cases of 'suggestive suicide.' A man may commit suicide through negative suggestion, just as effectively as by any other means. In a midwestern city, a man by the name of Joseph Grant, a bank official, 'borrowed' a large sum of the bank's money, without the consent of the directors. He lost the money through gambling. One afternoon, the Bank Examiner came and began to check the accounts. Grant left the bank, took a room in a local hotel, and when they found him, three days later, he was lying in bed, wailing and moaning, repeating over and over these words, 'My God, this will kill me! I cannot stand the disgrace.' In a short time he was dead. The doctors pronounced the case one of 'mental suicide.'

"Just as electricity will turn the wheels of industry, and render useful service if used constructively; or snuff out life if wrongly used, so will the law of auto-suggestion lead you to peace and prosperity. or down into the valley of misery, failure, and death, according to your degree of understanding and application of it."


I had to save myself from my own mental suicide. The first step to changing a detrimental belief or thought pattern is recognizing what you’re DOING TO YOURSELF. You must take responsibility, and then you can forgive yourself.

One of the other things I learned from this? Stop saying, “I would die,” about ANYTHING. Instead, say, “I WOULD LIVE!!”

I am doing whatever I need to do right now, but I am aware I need to raise my standards. Yet, I’ve learned there is a wrong way to set standards for yourself. Don’t attach punishments for yourself to the things you don’t want.

COMMENT BELOW: What did reading this bring up for you? 
 

WANT TO PUBLISH THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EMAILS OR ON YOUR BLOG?  

You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Rosella LaFevre is the Business Coach helping women entrepreneurs master mindset and intuitive marketing so they can enjoy a life lived on purpose. Get the FREE report on the #1 Secret to Signing 1:1 Clients: http://www.rosellalafevre.com/clients-free

Beliefs Essential To Your Sales Success

Beliefs Essential To Your Sales Success

You feel squeamish about selling your services, programs or products. I get it. Maybe it's just a twinge of fear or maybe the mere mention breaks you out in a cold sweat. I think as some point it was a much bigger deal to me than now. These beliefs represent some of the greatest shifts I've experienced along my journey in business.

Sales can be as easy as you make it. It begins with aligning your beliefs to make it so.


* I AM CAPABLE AND DESIRE TO BECOME A SALES ROCKSTAR.

A growth mindset is one that understand that any intelligence or ability can increase with proper effort to grow it. If you want to experience abundance in your business, you MUST develop your powers as a salesperson. Sales isn't the only critical skill you need in business, but it is one of them. You will only maximize your abilities as a salesperson if you desire to. Hopefully it's something you can be excited about.

Be a Sales Rockstar with these 5 beliefs

* I HAVE GIFTS TO SHARE AND SALES IS THE FIRST CHANCE I HAVE WITH A PROSPECTIVE CLIENT TO HELP THEM ON A DEEP LEVEL.

You must shift your thinking of sales/selling as this stinky fish situation you've built it into. Believing that no one wants to be sold or that doing the selling is painful does not serve you or your prospective clients. If you can instead understand that the sales conversation process is your first chance to help someone on a deep level, you'll find these conversations much more enjoyable. (Of course your marketing/messaging/content can all help someone before you ever start a 1:1 sales conversation, but adding a primacy factor to this belief helps underline its importance to your psyche so that you more easily absorb this belief.)

* I ONLY EVER INCREASE MY PRICES AND THE VALUE I DELIVER.

This one, oh boy! I heard this as an idea many times before I think I really integrated it as a belief. Now, as I coach an influencer through asking for bigger fees on his content offerings, I am more adamant than ever about this. Especially if your sales process includes showing someone a rate sheet or sales page that has a specific price attached to a service you offer, you do not want to go lowering the price just because of the money story the prospect is sharing with you (or the one you're writing about them in your head).

* MY COMFORT LEVEL IN THE SALES PROCESS INCREASES MY POTENTIAL CLIENTS' COMFORT IN THE PROCESS AND I DEEPLY DESIRE FOR MY PROSPECTIVE CLIENTS TO FEEL COMFORTABLE.

Haven't you ever noticed that the more comfortable someone else is, the more comfortable you usually are in response? Like on a date, you may be nervous but if the guy (or gal) you're with is cool as a cucumber, you usually get there too. That's exactly the principle we're working with in this belief. If you're comfortable in the sales process, your prospective client will be too. You want them to be comfortable discussing working with you, right? You want it to be an easy yes for them, right? Then you have to be comfortable first. You're the guide here, no matter what you're selling so you have to come to this process with not just comfort but authority.

* IT'S FUN TO TALK ABOUT THE WAYS I CAN HELP OTHERS.

Whether you're writing sales copy or having that 1:1 sales conversation as during a Discovery Call, I hope you are excited to talk about the ways you help others. Our energy is felt by others every time they read our writing or hear our voice. They may not be entirely conscious of this happening, but you should be conscious of the fact that your mood as you create or converse is being felt by others. We most want to work with others who enjoy what they do, don't we? That's why we must integrate the belief that it is fun for us to share how we help others.
 

COMMENT BELOW: Are there others you would add to the list?


WANT TO PUBLISH THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EMAILS OR ON YOUR BLOG?  

You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Rosella LaFevre is the Business Coach helping women entrepreneurs master mindset and intuitive marketing so they can enjoy a life lived on purpose. Get the FREE report on the #1 Secret to Signing 1:1 Clients: http://www.rosellalafevre.com/clients-free

The Consequences of Not Showing Up & Creating

The Consequences of Not Showing Up & Creating

How have you been sleeping? It's not such an odd question for me to ask as you might think. Lemme tell ya a story...

I didn't express myself on Wednesday. I also didn't get enough sleep that night.

My alarm went off yesterday morning while I was in a deep sleep, jolting me uneasily from rest. Staying in bed was my top desire in that moment.

I think one caused the other; my failure to express myself led to a lack of energy.

The past two days I awoke on my own before my alarm went off. I felt satisfied those mornings. I was excited for the day ahead and ready to let my sheets grow cold behind me.

The evenings before? Both of those nights before sleep I shared posts I wrote in my Facebook Group. (One of these posts was, hands down, the most vulnerable share I've ever done.) From my very heart and soul, I poured out a drink for those in my tribe.

And let's cover, quickly, the "obvious" consideration: hours of sleep each night. All three nights, I went to bed and had my alarm set so I would have 5-6 hours of sleep. No, not the 8 hours you're "supposed" to get. (We'll talk about what you're "supposed to do" another day.) But it's not like I was well rested after sleeping 8 hours a night and then trying to make do with only 6. Two of those nights, 5-6 hours was plenty!

Yes, I really believe that my failure to express myself led me to suffer a crappy wake-up. (I don't know if I'd call it a bad night's sleep, but those moments upon waking were painful.)

When I don't "unburden" myself, no amount of sleep is enough.

Abundant energy is mine to enjoy when I create from a place of pure intention.

Creation is soul sharing

For me, this is primarily through writing. I'm sure it looks different for others. For others, it may be drawing, or songwriting, or something else entirely.

I feel like this is an incredibly powerful realization…

I MUST CREATE.

How about you??? Do you have the urge to create? Have you been ignoring the call of your soul? Or are you going, "DUH ROSELLA"?

That's kind the of the way I was feeling as I journaled about this. "But really? REALLY??? Haven't I always known this on some level?" <-- This is what I wrote.

And yet, I realized: I've just never known such a specific benefit to my life like more restful sleep.

I journaled further about this, asking myself...

Seriously, what if I became a millionaire by creating from my soul and heart?

I, on some level, realize this is how it works for others and that it can be my reality if I just decide and COMMIT.

I'm learning now that the key for me is probably to create and share from my heart and soul rather than creating from a place of strategy. As in… No calculating what people need to read, but rather, creating what I NEED.

SHARE IN THE COMMENTS: Can you do the same in your life-business?

Check out my Rose Gold 90-Day Coaching Program >>

WANT TO PUBLISH THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EMAILS OR ON YOUR BLOG?  

You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Rosella LaFevre is the Business Coach helping women entrepreneurs master mindset and intuitive marketing so they can enjoy a life lived on purpose. Get the FREE report on the #1 Secret to Signing 1:1 Clients: http://www.rosellalafevre.com/clients-free

How You Can Experience More Ease As You Build Your Business

How You Can Experience More Ease As You Build Your Business

This is a question that could change your life if you are honest with yourself. Here it is:

 

What changes could you make in your life and business to experience more ease, even if you don't actually see how it could be done?

 

For me, the answers include:

  • Hiring an assistant to schedule my newsletters and solo mailers

  • Having someone else edit my availability for Welcome and Discover Calls via my scheduler

  • Batch meals made and frozen in individual containers so that eating when hungry is easy & filling

  • Help with laundry

  • A housekeeper to clean my kitchen and bathroom

  • An assistant who could run errands like donating books and clothes when I'm in a decluttering mood

  • Help turning livestream videos I do into other forms of content

A lot of this can be accomplished by hiring an assistant with a will-do attitude. And in moments of fear, I get stuck in my head about affording the help, but I truly don't think I can afford to keep operating without this help. These tasks take up so much energy that could be better spent serving others.


Start getting clear on what you desire as far as assistance to grow your business, and all other things you desire.

WANT TO PUBLISH THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EMAILS OR ON YOUR BLOG?  

You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Rosella LaFevre is the Business Coach helping women entrepreneurs master mindset and intuitive marketing so they can enjoy a life lived on purpose. Get the FREE report on the #1 Secret to Signing 1:1 Clients: http://www.rosellalafevre.com/clients-free

Admit It: You're Sick Of Yourself

Admit It: You're Sick Of Yourself

In the study of the Law of Attraction, wealth consciousness, and positive thinking, many are under the impression that they aren’t allowed to be unhappy with themselves. You can’t say out loud or even write how disgusted you are with yourself, can you?

Seriously, you’re not alone if that’s how you feel….

Hating yourself and terrified to admit it.

You can’t pretend that everything is fine when you’re bored with your own limitations, annoyed that you struggle to focus on anything but lack, pissed off that you haven’t allowed yourself to move past the level you’re operating at, and generally just wishing you could skip through all this bullshit to be the woman you’ve always wanted to be.

YOU HAVE TO LET THIS SHIT OUT.

FEEL it. Don’t ignore it. Don’t push it down. Move it through your system.

My method of choice is journaling. When I feel this way, I write it out.

Like this one time… A couple of days after a client-initiated chargeback was ruled in their favor (moral of the story: PayPal doesn’t help service providers), I was in a funk. I was feeling held back, and generally really tired of my own crap. I wrote it out. It looked like this:

“There’s so much contrast in my life right now. I am honestly sick of myself. Tired of my programming, my thoughts, my lack of confidence, my patterns. 

“So sick of myself!

“I need something to change. I need a fucking breakthrough.

“I’ve had tastes of life as the woman I want to be.

“I’m tired of me.

“I want change! I do. I want change more than I want the comfort of sameness.

“I’m tired of playing small. Tired of hiding from responsibility. Tired of feeling undesirable…

“I’m tired of slouching. 

“I want to feel safe. But I want to grow. I challenge my programming which thinks that perpetual doubt/lack is ‘safe.’ Just because I know that life well doesn’t mean it’s safe. I want the safety that comes from having thousands in savings (or more).”

Wow. That’s some self-loathing, huh?

The truth, though, is that true self-love, confidence and success can’t be had until you move through the self-loathing.

So, put it to a boil and let it bubble over. Then you’ll notice the heat go down.

You can also turn to tapping (or Emotional Freedom Technique) to move through these emotions.

When I journaled out these emotions, I was able to move forward, busting through my blocks and restoring my own confidence, and I know it all happened quicker than if I’d tried to ignore the angst.

What are you TRULY feeling in this moment? How do you feel about your progress? Remember: it’s safe for you to admit your feelings so you can move on. 

WANT TO PUBLISH THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EMAILS OR ON YOUR BLOG?  

You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Rosella LaFevre is the Business Coach helping women entrepreneurs master mindset and intuitive marketing so they can enjoy a life lived on purpose. Get the FREE report on the #1 Secret to Signing 1:1 Clients: http://www.rosellalafevre.com/clients-free

How to Know You're Meant for Big Success

How to Know You're Meant for Big Success

Even just 6 months ago, here’s where I was: Desiring $10,000 months. Not much more. Just enough to live comfortably. Serving clients alone. No help needed. Just doing my part to help a few clients.

I certainly didn’t want fame or feel called to have a major impact.

Except…. I did!

It was all there, beneath the surface. Beneath the need to be “satisfied” and “realistic.” I put them in quotes because they really are farcical concepts to me.

Are you ever truly satisfied? If NOT, you’re in the right place.

Does it boil your blood when someone tells you to be realistic? If YES, you’re in the right place.

Here’s what I know about myself and about you:

  • We’ve got something fucking important to say.
  • We’re changemakers.
  • We’re legendary leaders.
  • We’re blossoming leaders, always growing.
  • We’re meant to better the lives of millions while we’re here.
  • We’re here to rise from obscurity and share our message with the world.
  • We’re excited by the challenges we face in heeding that call to help millions.
  • We know the power in us to create our own realities.
  • We know the power in us to help others improve their realities.
  • We are meant for BIG fucking things in 2017.

I know I am these things. Am I right in my statements about you?

If this feels kind of true… Like you want it to be true… Then it IS!

You just need to embrace these things as part of who you are. Undeniable.

I want to help those of you who feel this way… You know you’re a BIG FUCKING DEAL and you want to make sure 2017 is the year that the world starts to recognize you.

Sign up for a 15 minute discussion with me about how I can help you step into those big shoes the Universe is urging you to walk around in.

First, I'll want to know, are they Christian Louboutin, Jimmy Choo or another fabulous brand? Share in the comments ;)

 

WANT TO PUBLISH THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EMAILS OR ON YOUR BLOG?  

You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Rosella LaFevre is the Business Coach helping women entrepreneurs master mindset and intuitive marketing so they can enjoy a life lived on purpose. Get the FREE report on the #1 Secret to Signing 1:1 Clients: http://www.rosellalafevre.com/clients-free

What Election Day Taught Me About Myself As A Leader

What Election Day Taught Me About Myself As A Leader

I’m emotional today. I’ve cried. Sobbed. Blown crazy amounts of snot out of my nose.

Yes, this is election related but it’s about so much more than who won the election held in the United States.

I’ve seen people I respect writing to their audiences that entrepreneurs must not be distracted by this. And that their disbelief over this man’s victory is probably a sign of some discord in their own businesses. That didn’t sit too well with me.

I am passionately an entrepreneur. But I am also passionately a woman, passionately an American, and passionately a believer and supporter of democracy.

In fact, I was on my feet for about 13 hours yesterday running a polling place in Philadelphia as Judge of Elections. It is my passion that kept me going, and even running on fumes. And that’s the kind of passion that makes an entrepreneur successful at what they do. But more about that in a minute….

As Judge of Elections, I must keep things nonpartisan and create a safe place for individuals to vote their conscience. (I could crack a joke here about people’s consciences needing a date or 20 with a psychologist, but I won’t.)

  • I keep the environment free of talk of specific candidates.
  • I keep voters from taking photos or shooting video inside to prevent intimidation.
  • I keep the ballots that committee people hand to voters as they walk in from being left around.
  • I keep my poll workers running as efficiently as possible so our lines move quickly and people can vote.
  • I make phone calls downtown to figure out where voters who don’t actually know where they’re supposed to be voting from should go to make sure their vote is effective.

Judge of Elections is a position I’ve held for 9 elections (twice a year, every year, I’m there) to ensure that Americans -- 800 of them in my division -- can access their right to vote. Where I live, it means setting up machines, setting up the paperwork process and ensuring its smooth operation, and closing the machines at night while getting the results to the City so reporting is done as swiftly as possible and people can know within hours who has won.

I was baptized to the job under fire: the woman who had been Judge of Elections in my polling place for over 40 years died suddenly and I had to take over with very little training or warning on the day of the General election in 2012 that saw Obama reelected to the highest office in the land. And for those of you who vote only once or twice every 4 years, you need to know we get a LOT more traffic during Presidential elections than any other. In my division, which has some 800 registered voters, we see about 50-100 during a non-Presidential election and yesterday, we had 422 vote in my division.

I also want to mention that my voting place serves two divisions and I am often the only one with the knowledge to keep the place running. And while some can do this job and see it as just that: some hours they're putting in for a paycheck; I have definitely felt the intense weight of ensuring these 100s of voters make their voices heard.

My Judgeship has been a direct parallel to my journey as an Entrepreneur. I never expected to be here. And some days it doesn’t go how I want and I contemplate quitting, but it’s just not possible for me to quit.

Because as much as I believe in my ability to create a life for myself and make as much money as I wish doing something I love, I believe it is critical that we vote and that we value and defend democracy.

Yes, there is corruption in politics. No, the system isn’t perfect. (I’d personally like to do away with the Electoral College.) Yes, sometimes I fear that it is more like the show Scandal than we even know.

But I still believe in the power of democracy and of choice. I believe that the action of voting taken by millions of people shapes our present and our future. I believe that it is important to come together and decide who we are and what we want moving forward as a country just as I believe it is important that my clients do that for themselves in their lives & businesses.

Every single day you vote. You make choices about your own identity & beliefs. You make choices that affect other people, even people you have never seen or spoken to. You make choices that change the future for you and the world at large.

Are you voting your conscience? Are you voting with love or with fear?

Because that… THAT is why I cry today. While it is my job to not show partisan favoritism in the polling place, I am and will always be WITH HER, and I am devastated that she lost. Devastated that the vision she has for America is not the one that won the Electoral College. (Though we must remember she won the popular vote!) Devastated that the fear and anger spouted by the other guy was so well-received that the margin in the popular vote was only about 200,000 votes.

I am devastated that those who support the male candidate (I can't speak his name or write it) want me to shut up about my disappointment. These people clearly do not understand how democracy works. The votes have been cast and a winner decided, and I have to accept that, but I do not have to like it. I do not have to shut up. I do not have to hold back my tears.

I am allowed to feel the same shock, shame and embarrassment over this election that I'd feel if my loving, tells-me-I-can-do-anything boyfriend said to me, "Bitch, go make me a sandwich."

No, I didn't vote for her just because she's a woman. Or because I thought she was the lesser of two evils. I had my love affair with Bernie, too, but I also realized that the thoughts I was thinking that told me not to like her weren't coming from my own inner voice. They were put there by people who wanted Trump to win. And so, as the election drew nearer, I fell more and more in love with my candidate, Hillary Rodham Clinton.

As an entrepreneur, I can see how some shifts in her campaign, some shifts in how she presented herself and went about attracting supporters could have changed the results.

As an enlightened human being, I'm beyond saddened that fear and hate won.

I share all of this because (1) it's who I am and you should know who I am so you know whether or not you like me, and (2) you can learn something from this. Know that you are worthy of serving a purpose in life that you are endlessly passionate about. So passionate that you can run on fumes and you do it not just for yourself but for all the people you're serving.

Are you that passionate about how you serve and what you have to say to the world?

WANT TO PUBLISH THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EMAILS OR ON YOUR BLOG?  

You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Rosella LaFevre is the Business Coach helping women entrepreneurs master mindset and intuitive marketing so they can enjoy a life lived on purpose. Get the FREE report on the #1 Secret to Signing 1:1 Clients: http://www.rosellalafevre.com/clients-free

It's Easier To Struggle Than Live With A Vision Others Can't See

It's Easier To Struggle Than Live With A Vision Others Can't See

IT’S EASIER TO STRUGGLE THAN TO BE THE WOMAN WITH VISION.

I see the big things coming my way. The clients and the dolla-dolla bills. The first-class plane tickets to luxe locales. The finest hotel rooms during my business travels. The king size bed in a two-bedroom apartment. 

But today, I had a breakdown.

NOT the breakdowns of my past.
NOT where I ask what I’m doing wrong.
NOT where I can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.
NOT where I’m wondering what I need to do next to make shit happen.

This breakdown I had?
It was about begging for my boyfriend to have patience. To hold space for what I am TELLING him I have CALLED IN and CONSIDER DONE.

I keep telling him I’m making $11,874 this week.

I’ve made many offers this week, and I may not see the exact “how” of that money coming into my life, but I KNOW it’s coming.

By the way, you should know that my boyfriend is so supportive. When I used to say in moments of defeat, “Maybe I’ll just go get a job,” he’d tell me I didn’t need to do that. He’d say stuff like, “I know how painful that would be for you, you don’t have to.”

Today, our cell phone bill was due. The cash to pay it just hadn’t shown up… EXCEPT I’d found a $50 gift card from Sprint in my purse that I could use toward our bill. And I knew that I knew that I KNEW that this $50 gift card was a reminder that money comes to me easily at all times. 

He said, "I know you don't want to, but I suggest..." and listed off his suggestions, which included me going back with my tail between my legs to a gig I quit only when I woke up with total faith that it was time to do so. I understood where he was coming from. And frankly I felt downright guilty and selfish that every single one of my 50 trillion cells screamed, "noooooooo! You can't do that!!!"

I told my boyfriend that I appreciated his suggestions and his own bargaining about how he would help fix the situation. I knew something would work out so our cell service would be working just fine for his shift delivering pizzas. I had FAITH. I had faith about much more than that too, but it was the immediate problem. I took as many different actions as possible toward solving the issue.

Finally, something I told myself wasn't an option and wouldn't work just came together LIKE THAT!

I could have cried. I definitely smiled and whooped a bit and fell back in my seat, a long exhale escaping from my lips.

And I told my boyfriend then, again, that I AM bringing in $11,874 or better this week. I feel it so deeply it's like I can see it. That's when I told him that I carry some shame and judgment over how good of a partner I am. And I told him how I felt like others judge me like they would judge someone foretelling the coming of Jesus.

Begging for others to see your vision feels impossible. It feels like you're a crazy person when you think of how others see you.

When you've let go of the struggle, there is a time period where your reality is catching up. You know you're the rich child of an abundant universe and you know the money has been earmarked for you in the Universe's budget.

That's when you will feel a new kind of crazy. You're a prophet and others can't see what you see. 

You feel selfish.
You worry about being wrong and yet something tells you you aren't.

Conviction is required. Conviction may be the most difficult and yet most easy thing ever. When you aren't used to the cost of conviction, it can feel expensive.

But giving up your conviction? That's easy. You could slide right back into struggle and you know the deal there. Struggle and you are old friends. It's easy to say you cut off struggle but to slink back with your head hanging low. 

So you have to bear with the "I feel like people think I'm crazy but I KNOW I'm right" tape until you are proven right.

You have to look for evidence, vigilantly, that your vision is true.

That gift card I got today? Evidence that money comes to me easily in expected and unexpected ways.

That way to handle my bill that I thought was closed off to me? Evidence that we don't need to know the how when we take the first step.

The feeling of great relief when I had dealt with that bill? Evidence of my release of the struggle; evidence of the power of my faithfully held vision for my life.

You're worthy of what you want most. You're also capable of the growth required of you to get there. You simply choose to see it as done, hold the conviction that it is, and keep moving forward until and as it manifests.

No one has to understand the vision. You just have to understand that they don't understand and you have to know that pushing on, even when others do not understand and may even judge you, is your task.

It is easier to struggle than to be the woman with vision, but it's the woman with vision who will live an incredible, drool-worthy life complete with Gold Toilet Riches.

Build Supreme Confidence With 1 Simple Exercise

Build Supreme Confidence With 1 Simple Exercise

Here, I share a very simple exercise to help you build supreme confidence and master your success mindset.

Supreme Confidence in just 1 simple exercise

Signs You're a Born Leader

Signs You're a Born Leader

Here are some signs you're a born leader...

How To Have More Energy For Your Business

How To Have More Energy For Your Business

Want to have more energy for your business?

There's really one simple -- though perhaps not entirely easy -- step you need to take. Watch the video for more.

COMMENT BELOW: What was your reaction to my #1 tip to create more energy for your business?